seeingM

Ode to Isis

I was very saddened recently to learn of the loss of a magical cat named Isis.  She had a run in with some unknown dogs and now this precious little fur entity has made the transition on to the next adventure.  However, when an animal is so loved and adored, I believe that the spirit, love and empowerment that they so freely shared with their human family members and friends is something that stays on.  How do I know this?  Quite frankly, I am still alive today because of cats.

I am a repentant pet guardian who before having a fur family member of my own, often secretly thought that people who referred to their pets as more than just animals needed a bit of psychological help.  Now after having shared space off and on for over 16 years with cats, I totally get it.

It is many years ago now, but one night while sitting on the couch in my apartment in New York I was about to pass out from the most physical pain of my life.  It was my cat’s rushing to my side that prompted me to call a car service and to get myself to the nearest hospital.  I wrote my name and emergency contact information on a piece of paper, got myself down to the street and asked the driver to please check me in at the ER if I passed out during the ride.

It is a bit hard for me to admit here, but for a few moments on that couch before I called I hesitated at reaching out for help.  Deep somewhere inside the idea of passing out and just drifting off into the next adventure through death was very peacefully appealing.  I have never been suicidal as I have a profound appreciation for the sacredness of human life, but I do intimately understand it’s illusion and the allure for the seeming ending to emotional and physical pain.  I could never actively raise my hand to instigate my or anyone elses death, but here the universe seemed to be offering me a passive ticket off the earth ride going home.

This experience happened during a time in my life that I was living alone and with my erratic work schedule (I regularly get three weeks off each month), there literally were times that several weeks could pass before people in my world would worry about not hearing from me.  Something in me knew that things were physically quite bad and that I could have made the choice to just let go and I would have quietly slipped away.

At the time I was weary to the marrow of bones from dealing with and in the world as I was discouraged by so often seeing my fellow human family members behaving so badly and treating each other with such insensitivity, selfishness and vile disregard.  I also was overwhelmingly lonely missing regular conscious communication and was homesick for a place that I know is not physically here.  However, in that moment of choice, in profound pain, it was the love for my cats and the thought of what would happen to them in the time that it would take for someone to find my body that snapped me back into having the will to vigorously pursue living.

I ended up in the hospital for a week on massive doses of IV antibiotics for what turned out to be a life threatening kidney infection.  I then had almost 3 weeks of solid bed rest upon discharge when my cats rarely left my side.  This experience became an important turning point in my life where I knew that I will always choose to be here and will live and love and grow and share to the best of my current ability to do so until as the poet Rumi says, “Whoever brought me here will have to take me home”.  It was my cats and watching every archived video on Conscious Media Network that kept me sane during those weeks in bed.  http://www.cmn.tv/

Now every time I bury my face in the fur of a cat and feel and hear their purr, my heart gives a massive thank you to these precious entities that have such power to share and love and heal.  Yes HEAL.  It is not new age delusional pet owner mumbo jumbo.  In looking at ways to reduce bone loss in astronauts it has been discovered that the sound frequency emitted by the purr of cats cause bones to heal faster.  I do believe that it was the time spent in bed with my cats close by which is the main reason I do not have more of the expected permanent damage to my kidneys.

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=why-do-cats-purr

My heart goes out today to the human family members of Isis.   I so know how the actual fur and heard purr will be physically missed.  However, I believe to the core of my being that Isis is giving a hug to us still on each bit of Autumn breeze that caresses the cheek.  She is now free to watch over and heal in ways we are only beginning to remember.

a quiet moment captured when I turned after feeling Isis watching in the grass

Love to all the human family cat people in this moment of profound heart loss and potential of healing hearts found.

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This entry was published on October 7, 2012 at 4:40 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

9 thoughts on “Ode to Isis

  1. Anonymous on said:

    Touching description for someone like me who wants to understand a cat connection but doesn’t quite get it yet.

  2. Dear Anon,

    Thanks for reading and responding. As a bit more information I offer the work of biologist Rupert Sheldrake. He is a professor at Trinity College, Cambridge and a former fellow of Harvard, Cambridge University and the Royal Society (in other words as can be important at times, he is a trained scientist and not only a guesser in the wind).

    Very interesting scientific work.

    As for getting to know cats, I do not recommend just jumping in and getting one. If you have friends with one, spend some time hanging out. Also if your schedule permits,volunteer at a shelter. Pet “ownership” is a big responsibility which most people take too lightly in my humble opinion and it is best to make sure it is for you before doing it.

    As another story from my own life, when I was writing this post my cat Luke jumped up on the couch and sat right next to me squished up next to my leg. Now that is not an uncommon thing for many cats to do, but in my home, if Luke sits on or near you it gives you cart blanche to order whoever is home to bring you whatever you need so you do not have to move…so rare is it for this cat to do this. Luke loves to be in the room and around us, but it is rare rare rare for him to not want his own space. It is like he knew I was writing and thinking about him. You see it was he who jumped up on my lap all those years ago and looking deep into my eyes, reminded me how much I still had to do here and helped me make the choice not to let go.

    Joy On YOur Journey,
    M

  3. I just remembered this too, which I find absolutely to follow the temperament of Luke (only usually for me it is when I am stressed or upset or deeply thinking about him that he will also come):

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  6. Bill Hicks = Hero

    H. ❤

  7. British doppelganger, Bill Bailey = ❤

    -x.M

    • Hmmm . . . they do look suspiciously alike.

      Maybe N covertly teleports himself into a second manifestation as a celeb?

      Still, as long as he comes home without the mullet hair cut eh?

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