Just a few days ago I was speaking with N about my current challenges related to experiencing impatience for all that I know is coming and catching up into the actual experience of our external now during 2013. In recent years, I have experienced a heightened ability to sense the growth of roots from future events peculating below the surface now. It is a quiet, sniff of a knowingness way before any activity is externally experience-able and deletable in my life.
As wonderful as this peek into the future can be, it does present some unique challenges to then being fully present in the now. When meeting N for the first time for example, it was like having been hit by a mack truck where my conscious awareness was smeared across access to our future calendar together as I stood in a field in England saying hello to the man I had never met face to face before, but knew would be my husband. How do you then socially and appropriately interact in that moment? He and I deep belly laughed…alot. We still do.
The Chinese have a word for these types of relationships and experiences we encounter in our lives they call “yuanfen”. This word is used to describe the state of knowingness in a moment of fate and destiny. For me this perfectly describes what it is to stand physically looking at just the tip of the iceberg while all the while ones heart and soul is swimming in the clear water depths knowing of all that lies beneath… all that is coming.
Recently another magic blogger has fruitfully stepped into the garden of my life gifting me another beautiful reminder of this:
(what a wonderful sync to find her visiting my current view “coincidentally” just after I finished watching this a few days ago:
I have been treating myself to watching the 10 part series over the holidays).
She beautifully describes what it is to live planting seeds with intent for experience under the surface and then remembering to just let go and tend to the current garden that is already available to view and actually in bloom in our external life.
This is the art of managing the experience of fate and destiny that requires loosening our grip on expected outcome and growth in specificity on the wheel of time. For me personally, it is what it is to operate ones life from a more practical and working understanding of the concept of faith. It is done by living remembering to embrace the now while also allowing room for what the future already holds coming up into view right on time. It is swimming deep in the garden of our lives while remembering that by design we only consciously see a fraction of what is actually going on at first. When we desire the deep dive into the soil, earning the ability to access more, on to mastering impatience we must go :).